The Meaning of the word ‘Service’

For this one I thank Steve Welsby:

I became confused when I heard these terms with reference to the word ‘Service’.

Internal Revenue  ‘Service’

U.S. Postal  ‘Service’

Telephone ‘Service’

Cable  ‘Service’

Civil  ‘Service’

Customer ‘Service’

State, City, & County Public ‘Service’
This is not what I  thought ‘Service’ meant. But today, I overheard two farmers talking, and one of them
said he had hired a bull to ‘Service’ a few cows.

BAM!!!

It all came into focus. Now I understand what all those ‘Service’ agencies are doing to us.

I hope you are as enlightened as I  am.

Country Funeral Story

As a young minister in Kentucky , I was asked by a funeral director to hold a grave-side service for a homeless man, who had no family or friends. The funeral was to be held at a new cemetery way back in the country, and this man would be the first to be buried there.
 
I was not familiar with the backwoods area, and I soon became lost.  Being a typical man, I did not stop to ask for directions. I finally arrived an hour late.  I saw the backhoe and the open grave, but the hearse was nowhere in sight.  The digging crew was eating lunch.

I apologized to the workers for my tardiness, and I stepped to the side of the open grave.  There I saw the vault lid already in place.  I assured
the workers I would not hold them up for long, as I told them that this was the proper thing to do.
 
The workers gathered around the grave and stood silently as I began to pour out my heart and soul.
 
As I preached about ‘looking forward to a brighter tomorrow’ and ‘the glory that is to come,’ the workers began to say ‘Amen,’ ‘Praise the
Lord,’ and ‘Glory!’ The fervor of these men truly inspired me.  So, I preached and I preached like I had never preached before, all the way
from Genesis to Revelations.   I finally closed the lengthy service with a prayer, thanked the men, and walked to my car.
 
As I was opening the door and taking off my coat, I heard one of the workers say to another, “I ain’t NEVER seen nothin’ like that before,
and I’ve been puttin’ in septic tanks for thirty years!”

WRONG E-MAIL ADDRESS

A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier.

Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So, the  husband left Minnesota and flew to Florida on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day.

The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an email to his wife.  However, he accidentally left out one letter in her email address, and without realizing his error, sent the email.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Houston , a widow had just  returned home from her husband’s funeral. He was a minister who was called home to glory following a heart attack.

The widow decided to check her email expecting messages from relatives and friends. After reading the  first message, she screamed and fainted.

The widow’s son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:

To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I’ve Arrived
Date: October 16, 2005

I know you’re surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones. I’ve just arrived and have been checked in.

I’ve seen that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then!!!! Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.

P. S. Sure is darn hot down here!!!!